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Walmart Not Monkeying Around With Coconut Milk

Note: This article may contain commentary or the author's opinion.

Sometimes you come across a story that CAN’T be true. A story that is just so weird, outlandish and unlikely that it seems….bananas?

As Americans, we have a certain privilege. If we don’t like our job, we can quit and find a new one. If we don’t like where we live, we can move.

As the world’s wealthiest people, we also consume a LOT of goods. Not all of these goods are made in America. Actually, very few are made in America.

Where does that leave us? Well, very often turning a blind eye to the facts behind how and where our favorite products are made. American’s love little more than to proclaim their moral superiority, while we strap on our Nike shoes and our expensive jeans.

So what’s wrong with that you ask? C’mon, we all know what the issue is. Those Nike’s were probably made by kids making a nickel a week, whose only benefit package is regular beatings for falling behind. But, GO LEBRON! And Disney, and all the other companies that virtue signal and complain about America, yet exploit children for a buck.

Where, as Americans do we draw the line? At what point does our tolerance meter peg red and we say NO MORE? Enough monkeying around, I’m going to tell you! Team monkey!

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Walmart has become the latest retailer to pull a brand of coconut milk linked to an investigation by People for the Ethical Treatments of Animals into claims of forced monkey labor.

The Thailand-based company was the subject of a PETA Asia investigation in 2019 that alleged monkeys were abused, chained, and forced to pick coconuts.

Monkey slave labor. Yes, you read that right. Monkey slaves picking coconuts.

It’s as if no one in Thailand has seen any of the “Planet of the Apes” movies. We know how this ends! Working for bananas now, on horseback whipping humans later.

“Denied the freedom to move around, socialize with others, or do anything else that is important to them, these intelligent animals slowly lose their minds. Driven to desperation, they pace and circle endlessly on the barren, trash-strewn patches of dirt where they’re chained,” wrote PETA.

According to PETA, Walmart’s decision to drop the Chaokoh brand from stores and online comes after it received more than 86,000 emails from PETA supporters.

For now however, I need to find my Nike’s. Got some shopping to do.