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SpongeBob Crook Arrested in Tulsa, Crusty Crab Safe

Note: This article may contain commentary or the author's opinion.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? We all know it’s SpongeBob Square Pants, but after getting arrested for a string of burglaries in his Tulsa area apartment complex, Edward Price might wish he were in an underwater suit like Sandy squirrel.

Price pulled off a string of break-ins in his own apartment complex in Tulsa Oklahoma, and if that isn’t risky enough, he couldn’t even manage to disguise his own appearance because of his insatiable love for everything “Bikini Bottoms”. Actually, he might have gotten away with the robberies if he had worn bikini bottoms instead of the same SpongeBob gear!

I get it, I do. I love the NFL, specifically the Cincinnati Bengals. I even got the nickname “Bengaldan” at work, and from friends. But you can bet your orange and black striped butt that if I was going to jack my neighbor’s house, I’d wear something a little more discreet.

Check this out from Outkick:

Tulsa Police arrested Edward Price after serving a search warrant on September 16 at the Waterside Apartments Complex. Residents at the apartment complex reported five burglaries from July through mid-September.

There were similar circumstances surrounding the break-ins, including witnesses seeing a suspect wearing SpongeBob Square Pants shorts and socks during the crimes.

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Socks? That’s some serious commitment to fashion, symmetry and Nickelodeon. I respect that. I have Bengal socks that I only wear around the house, you’d never catch me out in public, or in my neighbor’s house with them on. Of course, I’m not a criminal, so you’d never catch me in my neighbor’s house, and if I was, I’d probably try all black or something a little more discrete than a smiling sponge.

Making the job of the detectives easier, Price attempted to sell the stolen items on Facebook Marketplace with his SpongeBob clothing visible in the background of the pictures.

Ed, what are you doing son? Facebook Marketplace? Are you trying to sell an old cat climber? Maybe a mattress “still in plastic”? Can you imagine the surprise you would get when you log onto marketplace and see the flat screen you had stolen the night before? This crook is lazy and careless, but at least he is a snappy dresser!

The Tulsa Police Department joked about the unique arrest on Facebook.

“FYI, the suspect’s apartment was not located in a pineapple under the sea,” they wrote.

You have to love the humor from the Tulsa PD. Their social media game is on point. I don’t think “nautical nonsense” was something Price wished, he just wanted to sell your stuff and make all the profit. To heck with a pawn shop, cut out the middleman!

Police arrested Price for second-degree burglary after a felony conviction, knowingly concealing stolen property and possession of a firearm in the commission of a felony.

Looks like Price will be going away for a bit. I hope they let him take his SpongeBob jammies with him to prison. I mean, who is going to mess with a grown man in Bikini Bottoms gear, besides Squidward.